My Suicide Attempt

On August 7th my husband, Tony, had to call 911 because I tried to take a bottle of pills. I only got them into my hand then he stopped me. I was hospitalized in a psychiatric hospital for a week. I was stressed because of a setback with dizziness that started a week before. I felt drunk and slept most of Wednesday and half of Thursday. I was trying to babysit my daughter’s 2 puppies (and 1 got out of the yard and got lost), babysat my grandson, Joshua, Tuesday even though I was still dizzy, worrying about my son because his financing didn’t come through after buying a T-Mobile store and worried about my 20 year old grandson who was in a severe car accident and was in really bad shape.

I was really in bad shape and believe it is because of my sensitivity. I knew it was wrong but while it was happening I couldn’t control myself. It was from a fight with Tony and he ended up holding me down for almost an hour to keep me from reaching for pills again. Tony said…I am done, it’s over, I’m finished; so I reacted with panic that I would have no form of support going forward. The police arrived and calmed me down. They had to handcuff me in the car for my own protection. I am fine and actually enjoyed being in the hospital. I got a little vacation away from real life.  I was chosen to be interviewed by a psychiatrist staff in front of 20 students because of my complex nature of health symptoms. It took them a week to realize I am a package deal, not only the mental because it and the physical work off each other. They found me a new primary care doctor that will coordinate with all my specialists and new psychiatrist. The goal is to find meds that have dual purposes so I don’t have to take 22 different meds for so many things.

The best thing about this is that I prayed the Monday before this happened for help to get off lots of my meds and to get my healing moving faster. So my prayer was answered and now I have to follow through.

I will not be on line too much so I can continue to concentrate on my relaxation through jigsaw puzzles and scrapbooking. My angel community did a tarot card reading for me and when I heard it, I realized that I was lonely.

I am re-writing this today, December 26, 2014 to update some information. I am still being seen by psychiatric professionals and will probably have to most of my life. I learned too many times that even with the help of the doctors, I cannot go off my antidepressants because I have these mental illnesses through genetics. I keep fluctuating with my feelings and have become a recluse. I pray with the help of God and my angels that I can become stronger and go back to my spiritual studies and advance my intuitive abilities.

I pray that anyone else that suffers as I do that you never get to the point of no return like I did and you get the medical help you need to live a comfortable and happy life.

Love and blessings to all. Cathy


About Catherine M Laub

Catherine M Laub, Your Turquoise Angel Guide, is the Host of Spiritual Destinations Radio Show, a Psychic and Spiritual Guide, a 25 time Best-Selling Inspirational Author, and a Speaker regarding depression, anxiety, and health issues. Catherine helps people feel better with her positive outlook and describing overcoming her own deep depression. She is an advocate for mental illness through her campaign “Brighten Your Day With Turquoise.” Turquoise, because it is a calming color and helps us think clearly. Her goal is to help others achieve their potential without all the obstacles that get in the way. She has many health challenges and wants to guide others with some of the same ones and to understand how to live with illness and be able to have a normal life. She guides others to feel invigorated and empowered to go forward in their own struggles. Remember to have faith and know you can pull through almost anything!!!
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